Tuesday, October 28, 2008

My Own Farewell

Since Passive Voice and Archie did their own farewell posts, I figured I better do one as well. I'm surprised the good folks at Fire Jay Mariotti haven't jumped all over this because they HATES TMQ, but as a long-suffering Dolphins fan this jumped out at me.

Easterbrook is making the point that Mike Singletary might be a bad choice for the Niners because he's never been a head coach before. As an example, he cited Cam Cameron:

Never-before Cam Cameron's year running Miami? Let's not go there.

No, Gregg, let's please, because I like making you look like a fucking tool. But first let's make like a Secret Service driver in Daley Plaza and back up, because I like to blog like Tarantino. Gregg ALSO said:

Three others had some head coaching experience: Tony Sparano was a small-college head coach at Division II New Haven...

Now let's look at the facts. Tony Sparano was, in fact, the head coach of New Haven from 1994 to 1998. (By the way I fucking love Tony Sparano. He is like the Bizarro Wannstache.) It was a Division II school, but the fact is that he was pretty good there, posting a record of 41-14-1. Not bad at all. But guess what? If you guessed Cam Cameron was a head coach in college, you are smarter than Gregg Easterbrook. Or else you know how to use Wikipedia.

Cameron coached at his own alma mater, Indiana University, from 1997 to 2001. Unlike Bizarro Wannstache, he sucked, winning about a third of his games. Also unlike Bizarro Wannstache, he was actually coaching Division I players, including Antwaan Randle-El, and playing quality Big Ten teams (bear in mind that Michigan was actually pretty good back then) so there's something to be said for that. The two men did go on to be successful coaches in the NFL working for head coaches who knew their shit and are generally very well respected. Coincidentally, they both ended up coaching the Dolphins in consecutive years. Bizarro Wannstache seems to be doing a good job where Cameron won only one more game than I have in my own NFL Head Coaching Career.

What's the point you ask? The point, my friends, is that CAM CAMERON WAS A FUCKING HEAD COACH BEFORE HE TOOK THE DOLPHINS GIG. Easterbrook points this out as if it is the strongest support of his thesis (teams should not give men with no head coaching experience a head coaching job in the NFL) and it is blatantly false. Gregg, you were once a pretty good and interesting writer. Do your fucking homework.

And with that, I bid you readers adieu. Good night, and good luck.